Tips To Push Through When Your Motivation Is Lacking
I feel a pit in my stomach just thinking about it: self-doubt. The lies we create in our heads that tell us that we just aren’t good enough. I know them well, and I struggle with them often.
Self-doubt is an entirely normal part of being human, but sometimes we can start to believe that these lies and doubts are facts. Like those times you told yourself:
- “I won’t be successful.”
- “I’m not good enough.”
- “I should be doing more.”
- “People don’t like me.”
- “I can’t achieve my goals.”
Do any of those thoughts ring a bell?
Self-doubt can also go hand-in-hand with imposter syndrome. This is the feeling that you are a fraud, you are not knowledgeable in what you do, or that you will be “found out” as being inadequate.
Why Do We Lie To Ourselves?
Overcoming self-doubt starts with acknowledging that these doubts are lies. You doubt yourself out of fear and tell yourself lies to protect yourself from failure.
Because if you never start then you can’t ever fail. Taking the first step is often the hardest, and those feelings of self-doubt keep you stuck behind the starting line.
If there is even one thing I want you to take away from this post, it is that you are not the lies you tell yourself.
Start To Overcome Self-Doubt By Identifying Your Areas Of Self-Doubt
What is important to you in life? What are your goals? Those big, lofty goals that you only dream about.
Now, what are you afraid of? Are you afraid that you won’t be able to accomplish them? Or that the opportunities will never come?
I want to share one of my self-doubts. I am doubtful that I’m doing the right thing when it comes to my blog. Sometimes I wonder if the work I’m putting in is effective, good enough, or resonating with anybody. Sometimes I doubt whether I have chosen a topic that people care about or need help with. And then that leads to overwhelm and procrastination!
I start researching to make sure the topic I have is good enough, I feel like I’m behind the competition when I look at how successful other people are, and I wonder if I will ever feel like I’m doing well at what I do.
These thoughts are scary, and sometimes it feels more comfortable to continue doubting myself, as my need to do things the right way stops me in my tracks.
Can you relate?
Take Time For Reflection
I want you to dig deep and identify the following:
- Goals you are currently working towards, or areas of your life that are important for you to do well in.
- What are you afraid of when it comes to accomplishing these goals? Imagine what might happen if you aren’t successful.
- What are beliefs you hold about yourself that cause you to doubt your abilities?
- What are beliefs that you have seen in others or heard from others that cause you to doubt yourself?
3 Ways To Overcome Self-Doubt
- Create a list of your strengths that invalidate your doubts
- Think about the worst-case scenario/outcome
- Think about times you have been successful in the past
1 – Create A List Of Your Strengths
When you get caught in the downward spiral of negative thoughts, it becomes easier to think more and more negative thoughts and stew in the resulting difficult emotions. One way you can counteract these negative thoughts and self-doubts is by injecting some positivity into your mind.
Each and every one of you has multiple strengths that make you the unique person you are. Think about the strengths you have that directly invalidate the doubts you are having about yourself.
For example: Let’s say you doubt that you can give a presentation at your work meeting tomorrow because you fear that you are not knowledgeable enough.
- Self-doubt = I am not knowledgeable enough to give this presentation, my coworkers and superiors will know I lack the knowledge required for this job.
- Strength That Challenges/Invalidates Your Doubt = I was hired and assigned to give this presentation for a reason- others had confidence in my abilities. I am professional, sufficiently prepared for the presentation, and have successfully educated my coworkers on similar subject matter.
Try this out for yourself by first identifying what your self-doubt thoughts are. Then, directly challenge those doubts with factual evidence about your strengths from the past or present.
2 – Think About The Worst-Case Scenario
So, why would you possibly want to think about the scariest possible outcome to result from your self-doubt inducing scenario? The reason is because often, we make things so much scarier and bigger in our heads than they actually are.
Actually taking the time to think about the worst likelyoutcome can help to put your doubts into perspective. Like, if you doubt your spelling and/or grammar skills and make an error in your email- it’s not the end of the world. Most people will probably overlook it and forget about it within 5 minutes.
Even if your situation is much more grandiose than sending emails, you will find that often the worst-case scenario is if you don’t take any action or move forward. You are afraid for a reason- what you are doing is important!
Remember that the majority of the time the worst-case scenario will not happen, and even if it does- you can surely handle it!
3 – Think About Times You Have Been Successful In The Past
Think about a time when you have been anxious about something in the future, or doubtful of how things would go. Did you make it through? Are you still here? Even if the experience wasn’t the greatest, I can guarantee that there was something you could have learned from it to improve how you approach the situation next time.
This information is golden to help you conquer self-doubt in the present moment. Think about the times when you experienced doubt and pushed through anyway. Remind yourself that you have done it before, and you can certainly do it again. All you have to do is actually do it!
Self-Doubt Is Normal And Temporary
Even the most successful and intelligent of people experience self-doubt. It is an entirely normal human experience, but can sometimes prevent us from moving forward and accomplishing the things we want to or need to.
Feelings of self-doubt are not permanent and you can always change them just by realizing that they are not facts. Once you can understand the lies that you tell yourself, you can start to remember why you are doing this in the first place, and all the unique strengths you have that will help you become successful.
I hope these tips were helpful.
If you’re struggling with self-doubt and/or imposter syndrome, I’d love to support you and help you increase your confidence. Click here to schedule an appointment with me for therapy.
